Someone by the name Not Me has taken up residence in my house. They are responsible for a wide array of missing food, objects, undone chores, and general aggravation. Not me is to blame everytime a question is asked such as: Did you leave all these dishes in the sink? No, Not Me......Who drank all the milk? Not Me.......Who put the empty container of crackers back in the pantry? Not Me....Whose turn is it to take out the trash? Not Me.....So you see why I have to identify this person and have a serious, one on one conversation with them. I have a few likely suspects:
Now this guy looks very suspicious to me. I don't see him often, so I think he just may be guilty, since no one ever sees Not Me actually do anything.
Now this guy is trying too hard to look innocent. I know for a fact he is responsible for the bulk of the milk being consumed. He's even flaunting the fact that he's taking my cookies. But I don't see him around the house enough to blame him for the wide varieties of acts that are blamed on Not Me.
Now this guy would be my number one choice to be Not Me. He just looks like someone who would leave empty boxes and containers in the pantry and not care. But, he's also the one who makes the most complaints about Not Me. There is something about "He who protesteth much is guilty of the same" but I'm not putting my money on him.
Now I see this guy around....alot. I usually see him chewing or swallowing something. He usually has an excuse and come to think of it, that excuse is usually Not Me. But he does do his chores so he can't be responsible for everything that happens around here.
Now this one is a quiet little thing. She slinks around doing what she wants, and never makes excuses or apologies. I'm positive this kitty is not the infamous Not Me.
So, the mystery of who Not Me is deepens. I will continue to spy around the corners, watch fridge, pantry, and cabinets to see if I can catch Not Me in the act.